* Written by ProtoBassX
*It was a quiet night inside the Island Attackers base, everyone was quietly asleep except one*
PBX: Where do we keep the chocolate cake again? … I hate being an insomniac. It’s so boring in the night when everyone’s asleep… that’s the reason why I’m so hyperactive in the day. Why am I talking to myself again?
Rebel: ZzZ… the real CIA has nothing on us… kill Crab…
PBX: Er… I have an idea! I’ll see what everyone’s dreaming about by listening to what they mumble in their sleep! Hee hee, I’m an evil little crab… *tip-toes to Outlaw’s room*
Outlaw: ZzZ… mmm, sewage…
PBX: Ew… *tip-toes to GDT’s room*
GDT: ZzZ… kill Magna… take over Island Attackers.. rule with an iron fist…
PBX: I smell rebellion. *tip-toes to Void’s room*
PBX: I guess he doesn’t talk in his sleep… *tip-toes to Ti-An’s room*
Void: Crab’s nosy. I hope Donald Trump comes to abduct him. He thought I was asleep. Hah.
PBX: Where’s Ti-An? He should’ve been here and I didn’t hear him leave his room. I’ve been awake all night. I hope he wasn’t abducted by someone like Donald Trump… Oh well, I’ll just keep going. *Tip-toes to Ghaleon’s room*
Ghaleon: Legacy of Kain… Raziel… Blood Omen… Lodoss… ZzZ…
PBX: That was strange… *Tip-toes to Deathtuna’s room*
Deathtuna: ZzZ.. die Burner Man.. no not again…
PBX: Poor Deathtuna…
PBX: What was that? Sounded like it came from outside. *Walks to door* Hey, I hear something…
Ti-An: You’ll never take me alive!
???: That’s okay.
*There is a “clunk” sound*
PBX: I better help! *Opens door* God damnit, I knew it.
Serges: *Clobbers PBX over the head with a club* Ya-ba-daba-doo!
Agile: You’ve been watching too many Flintstones episodes…
Agile: And you too many “I love Lucy” reruns. Let’s take these two to the boss.
Violen: You think the boss is gonna let us ride the golf carts on his golf resort?
Serges: Shut up Violen. The audience isn’t supposed to know who the boss is.
Violen: Yeah. Right. Er, so how do we get off this island? We parachuted here, remember?
Agile: Call the boss.
Serges: Right. *Pulls out a cell phone and dials* … Boss? How do we get out of here?
???: I never should’ve said “You’re hired.” When you’re done, I might say my catch phrase.
Serges: No boss! Not the catch phrase! Please! We’ll be more efficient!
???: Fine. Just bring Ti-An to me.
Serges: We’ve also obtained Bubble Crab.
???: Excellent… one of my Million Dollar Helicopters should be picking you up soon. Report to me when you’re off the island.
Serges: Yes sir. *Click* A heli should pick us up soon.
Agile: All right, be quiet until it comes. We might wake up the others. It is after all 3:00 in the morning. …Violen wake up! *Kicks Violen awake*
Violen: Oops. Yeah… don’t you guys think the boss is gonna end up being manipulated by Sigma?
Serges: Of course not. Sigma’s been defeated so many times, it’s not even funny. There’s no way he’ll be back.
Violen: But it’s possible–
Serges: No it’s not. Shut up.
Agile: Yeesh, you’re really offensive when it comes to Sigma.
Serges: Well the all mighty SIGMA couldn’t even give us our own dental plan. He didn’t like us, and the pay sucked…. The helicopter’s here.
*The X-Hunters get on the helicopter with PBX and Ti-An in duffle bags and the helicopter flies away*
Rebel: *Waking up* … what was that noise? It sounded like a helicopter that cost 1 million dollars and maybe owned by Donald Trump fly away to an island only 500 yards away… I should wake up the others. Or maybe I should fall back asleep…
Outlaw: *Walks in* Too late. I woke up.
Rebel: Oh… damn you. Let’s have a team meeting. Something’s suspicious… *Walks into main room* TEAM MEETING!
*The team assembles near Rebel, except for PBX and Ti-An*
GDT, Void, Ghaleon, Deathtuna: Mumble, mumble… why are we up so early? *Yawn*
GDT: Where’s PBX and Ti-An?
Ghaleon: Maybe they’re outside.
Outlaw: This early?
Deathtuna: What are we doing again? *falls asleep*
Rebel: *Kicks Deathtuna awake* Something suspicious is going on. First, I hear the sound of a helicopter. Second, PBX and Ti-An are missing–
GDT: How do you know? You haven’t even checked the base, have you?
Rebel: Of course not. I have a gut feeling. And since I’m the leader that makes me always right.
GDT: *mumble* Iron fist…
GDT: Er, nothing.
Outlaw: So it seems we have to rescue those two. Who could’ve taken them? Let’s brainstorm.
Deathtuna: ZzZ… no… get away from me X-hunters… I don’t have your weakness so leave… me alone… *snore*
Ghaleon: That’s it! The X-hunters must’ve taken them. But why? Let’s brainstorm some more.
Deathtuna: ZzZ… No.. get away from me… Donald Trump… new boss of the X-hunters…
GDT: That’s it! Donald Trump must’ve hired the X-hunters to kidnap Ti-An, but Bubble Crab heard some noise outside, since he’s an insomniac, went to help Ti-An and got caught! It makes perfect sense!
Outlaw: It doesn’t.
Deathtuna: ZzZ… perfect sense…
Void: Well, let’s go look for them anyways. To the Island Attackers Rescue and Special Operations Vehicles Cave!
Outlaw: I vote for a new name of that cave.
Ghaleon: I second that vote.
*The team went to the Island Attackers Rescue and Special Operations Vehicles Cave and got in the van*
GDT: We really need a new name for this cave… we should transform so we won’t be seen in our real form. *Transforms*
Rebel: Good idea GDT. *Transforms*
Outlaw: I don’t wanna be the rat guy…
Void: Suck it up man. *Transforms*
Outlaw: Eh, whatever. *Transforms*
Ghaleon: Wee! *Transforms*
Deathtuna: ZzZ… eh? *Transforms* Can I get back to my beauty sleep now? …ZzZ…
Rebel: Good. Now who’s driving?
Ghaleon: I guess I will. Where are we driving to again?
Rebel, Outlaw, Deathtuna, GDT, Void: …
Void: Well, I fixed up the van so it can fly now.
Outlaw: When did this happen? *Barfs on a sleeping Deathtuna*
Void: Yesterday. Just press the red button.
Rebel: If this is anything like Men in Black, don’t press the red button Ghaleon.
Ghaleon: Did you just say to press the red button? Okie dokie.
Rebel: Wait Ghal, No!
Ghaleon: *Pushes the red button* Hey nothing happened.
Void: 3.. 2.. 1..
*The van sprouts wings and boosts to 200 mph instantly*
Outlaw: Oh man, I’m dizzy… *barfs all over everyone*
GDT: So now that we’re going 200 mph, let’s slow down before we crash into something and… I dunno… DIE?!
Ghaleon: Way ahead of ya. *Turns the van around in the sky and slows it to 35 mph*
Rebel: Wait, what was the point of that?
Void: There isn’t one, I just like seeing you guys panic.
GDT: Don’t make me strangle you…
Void: Excuse me?
GDT: Huh? I didn’t say anything.
Rebel: Hey Ghal. Land in front of that suspicious-looking warehouse.
Ghaleon: You mean that one? *points*
Rebel: Yeah, that one.
Outlaw: Does anyone else find it strange that the suspicious-looking warehouse is on an solitary island only 500 yards away from our base?
Ghaleon: Not really.
Deathtuna: ZzZ… get away from… me Pirate Man…!
GDT: Can I throw him out of the van?
GDT: Aww, man.
Ghaleon: *Parks the winged van in front of the suspicious-looking warehouse* So, now what? We just charge in there?
Rebel: Of course. My “Leader Antics” drive me to do such acts. But first we gotta transform. *Transforms*
Void: You and your “Leader Antics”… well, let’s transform. *Transforms* Ah, much better.
Outlaw: Woot, no more rat guy! *Transforms*
GDT: I like my alter ego… *Transforms*
Deathtuna: ZzZ… wha? Oh yeah, that thing… *Transforms*
Ghaleon: Woo-hoo, back to my old self. *Transforms*
Void: Okay, it seems like we’re ready…
Rebel: Okay, now we charge in to the suspicious-looking warehouse, that of which we don’t even know if it’s where Bubble and Wire are being held, on 3.
Ghaleon: Hey, why didn’t we start at 0?
Deathtuna: ZzZ… wha? Wait, I’m waking up.
Rebel, Outlaw, GDT, Void, Deathtuna, Ghaleon: Charge! *The team charges into the warehouse*
GDT: No way.
Rebel: What? I thought I was never wrong!
Outlaw: Oy vey…
Deathtuna: Told ya…
Agile: I didn’t agree to it at first, but I couldn’t decline the pay.
Violen: Introducing… our new boss…
Serges: Donald Trump!
PBX: *Shackled to the wall* ‘What a surprise’ eh?
Ti-An: *Shackled to the wall* Get… me… out… of… here… I’m tired of having the smallest role in this epilogue…
Donald Trump: Yes, after “The Apprentice: Season 23”, it started to get boring. So I decided to hire these chumps I found in the alley, digging out my trash to give to the paparazzi. They told me their sad story, so I hired ’em. I want to restore the balance, so I gave them orders to kidnap one of the Island Attackers. They suggested Ti-An, so I agreed.
Rebel: What do we have to do with you and your “balance”? And why is this all so sudden?!
Donald Trump: The balance between good and evil. Ever since the Island Attackers formed, the balance was… un-balanced. So I’ve decided to use my money to–
Ti-An: Make neat-o gadgets and a secret lair like Batman?
Donald Trump: No. To make me an evil genius. I’m being tutored by Sigma himself.
Agile: I told you he was back Serges.
Serges: Shut up…
Violen: Lucy, you got some ‘splaining to do!
Everyone but Violen: …
Donald Trump: Well anyway, I suppose it’s time for my catchphrase since you brought them here.
Serges: Wha?! No! Please!
Donald Trump: X-Hunters, you’re fired.
Agile: Well at least we don’t have to fight the Island Attackers.
Serges: Yeah, let’s go.
Donald Trump: You guys spoiled my plan. I will now carry an everlasting grudge against you.
Island Attackers: …
Ghaleon: Did we even do anything?
Outlaw: Nope, we’ve just been standing here and Deathtuna fell asleep again.
Donald Trump: *Disappears into the shadows* We’ll meet again.
GDT: Let’s go after him!
Void: Not worth it.
Rebel: You know, I haven’t heard PBX say “Yay” once this entire epilogue.
PBX: Er, yay?
Rebel: God damnit. Let’s go guys.
*The Island Attackers walk out the warehouse into the van and fly off to their base*
Ti-An: Hey, we’re still here shackled to the wall.
PBX: Think they’ll come back for us?
Ti-An: No, not really.
*Back at the Island Attackers base*
Outlaw: Man, what freakin’ day… er, night. Donald Trump has gone evil and started carrying a grudge on us.
GDT: Aw, stuff it.
Ghaleon: We are Code: Island Attackers?
Rebel: SHUT UP!!! *Runs out of the room*