The Bath

*Written by Outlaw88*    (That’s me)

*We join our heroes in the den of their home… Minus one…*

Crystal: Zzzzzzzzzzzzz..*snort* damnbedsores..Zzzzzzzz

Moth: Listen Magna, we need to start getting some money. I estimate we need about $500 very soon.

Magna: What for? I’ve got plenty of money in my special hiding place. No one knows where it is!

Crab: Behind the couch in a mayo jar! YAY for coffee money!

Magna: *Grabs a chair and chases Crab* CURSE YOU!!!!

Sponge: Come on guys, don’t destroy the furniture…..

Overdrive: Hey if Magna catches him I call dibs on his PBX form.

Flame: So what do we need all that money for anyway?

Moth: We need the money for….

*Before he can finish an awful smell fills the room as Wheel Gator enters the room via a manhole. Magna stops chasing crab and grabs at his nose only to find he doesn’t have one. Crab, unaffected by reality at this point continues to keep running in a circle*

Gator: So what did I miss?

Magna: Sweet jumpin jeebus! Gator you smell worse than when I stepped in that pile of…

Sponge: Doesn’t that awful stench bother you?

Overdrive: Yeah didn’t you puke a lot before?

Gator: Well I ran a full diagnostic on myself and found some faulty things in there. It seems SOMEBODY decided to leave his old cocoon in my food processor.

Moth: I was wondering where that went….

Gator: So now that I’m fixed the food I eat and the so-called stench from my sewer hunts doesn’t bother me and keeps me going.

Crystal: Zzzzz… guh… Didn’t you inhale fumes to get energy?… *In a distant voice* heh heh glue… Zzzzzzzz

Gator: That was a secondary way. Food is my main source of energy. Look at these teeth, I’m a born hunter!

Magna: Listen fang-face you stink! You make us….*pukes*

Flame: You make my horns flicker….

Moth: You need to take a bath and I mean now!

Crab: Yay bath! I…

Gator: Hell no! I hate soap!

Overdrive: That’s tough because your taking a bath right now! The paint is peeling!

Flame: The paint was peeling when we got here.

Sponge: Your making my vines wilt.

Gator: I don’t care… I like it. Do you know how many hours of swimming in the sewer and how many critters I had to eat to get an aroma like this? *Slight pause* Ok so it was just today but still… *BURP*

Everyone else: GAAAAHHH!

Overdrive: Dude what the hell did you eat today?

Flame: Smells like a wet rat in a garbage dump….

Gator: Well lets see…. I caught a dog, found a dead rat, ate a few roaches for a snack and washed it all down with some fresh sewage. I got the chunky kind too!

*Everyone vomits except for Snail and Sponge*

Sponge: I would be puking if I had a mouth.. Thank God I get my energy from the sun and water.

Moth: I see we have to do this the hard way.. Overdrive, Sponge, Magna, let’s go!

Magna: Hey I’m the leader, I give the orders!… Let’s go.

*Overdrive dashes at Gator but is effortlessly tossed aside*

Overdrive: Ooof.. Geez how strong is he anyway?

Crystal: *Momentarily wakes* Alligators and crocodiles are among the strongest in the animal kingdom.. Zzzzz

*The action stops for a moment as everyone looks at Crystal who has gone back to sleep despite the smell*

Sponge: I have a plan. Magna use one of those Magnet Mines you have.

*Magna throws a small mine at Wheel that explodes in a blinding flash of light, stunning Gator. (Think Solar Flair)*

Sponge: Got him! *Wraps Gator in vines and lifts him into the air*

Flame: Lets get him to the bathroom quick.

Gator: NOOOOOOO! *Struggles*

Moth: Aw hush, it’s just soap and water. It’ll be over soon.

*All move into the bathroom, except Crystal who stays on the couch*

Magna: As your leader I want to congratulate you all on a job well done.

Overdrive: Yeah yeah.. Get on with it already.

Magna: *Ahem*…Flame, will you do us the honor of turning on the faucet?

Crab: Ohh this is my favorite part! I’ll get my toy boat and rubber ducky!

Flame: Uh… sure.

*As Flame Stag turns the faucet everyone in attendance stares in anticipation. Crab has also re-appeared with bath toys in hand.. However no water comes out*

Overdrive: Umm… Shouldn’t something be happening?

Sponge: Damnit he’s heavy you know! What gives?!

Magna: Yeah!

Moth: That was fast.

Flame: What do you mean?

Moth: Remember how I said we need $500? That was to pay for the water bill.

*Everyone is stunned.. Sponge drops Gator*

Gator: Ouch.. Woohoooo!!

Magna: Who the hell ran that bill up so high so fast?!?!

Crab: Yay bath! I take four a day!

*Magna looks at Crab with evil intentions mixed with rage*

Magna: YOU!!!!

*Before he can do anything the lights go out*

Moth: Make that $700 for the electric bill too.

Overdrive: Guess there is no avoiding it now. Lets go to the city and try to make some money.

Magna: You guys go ahead.. I’m going to..uh… practice my Ninjitsu..in the dark…

Moth: Like hell you are! We all have to pitch in to pay the bills! We need to at least buy some air fresheners!

Flame: Stop arguing guys, lets just get in the van and get going.

Overdrive: Should we wake Crystal?

Gator: I got it covered. *Burps in Snail’s face*

Crystal: AHHHHH!!!! I’M UP! I’M UP.. OH GOD AM I EVER UP!!!

Sponge: Ok everyone into the van… ‘cept you Gator.

Gator: Huh? Why?

Overdrive: Because we’ll all be in a van smelling you rat breath!

Moth: You can meet us in the city. Here is a tracking device. It will tell you where the van is at all times. Just take your usual way of transportation.

Gator: Yeah! Sewer swimming time! Anyone want to come?

Everyone else: …………..

Gator: Thats a no huh? Ok meet you guys there.

*And so out hero’s go their separate ways. Seven in a van and one in the sewer system that connects the Island they use to the city as well as many other unknown places. We re-join the seven in their incredible van*

Flame: Do you think we were too hard on Gator? He’s just doing what he enjoys.

Crystal: We weren’t hard enough! That belch will keep me awake for hours!

Overdrive: And that’s bad because?

Sponge: Think we should transform now?

Overdrive: Nahh.. We can do that when we land.

Crab: Hey what does this little dot mean?

Moth: What little dot? Which screen are you looking at?

Magna: Just ignore him and maybe he’ll shut up on his own.

Crab: Now there are two dots! This radar thing is fun!

Sponge: Did he just say radar?

Moth: *Kinda panicky* Holy Hell! We got a bogey and they have heat on us!

Crab: Huh? You have a booger that burns? I had that once when I accidentally inhaled some sand.

Magna: You idiot! He means someone is chasing us and they fired a missile!

Moth: Assume crash positions!

Crab: Ok, I call being in the trunk! *Jumps in the trunk before the van is hit. It goes down rather fast with everybody screaming*

Everyone else: AHHHHH!!!

Crab: WHEEEEEE!

Magna: Since we are going to die I have to tell you Crab. I always liked you a little.

Crab: And I always play with your ninja stuff!

Magna: WHAT?! I’M GONNA….

*The van finally crashes but has a surprisingly soft landing.*

Flame: Uhhhh.. Ouch?

Overdrive: What did we land on?

Moth: Oh no….Look at the sign……

*City Dump*

Magna: Who attacked us?

Crystal: I think we’re about to find out.

*A much smaller ship land and the X-Hunters leap out*

Violen: Prepare for trouble!

Agile: And make it… triple?

Serges: That’s it… No more T.V. for you guys. We are the X-Hunters remember? Not Team Rocket!

Violen: But we lose like them and…

Serges: SHUT UP!

Crystal: Hey if your the “X-Hunters” how come you’ve been hunting us?

Overdrive: Yeah! Why don’t you change your name?

Agile: Because X-Hunters sounds cool.

Serges: Enough talk, lets rumble!

*And so it begins: Magna using his magnetic powers makes a sword out of scrap metal and begins to duel with Agile. Moth, Overdrive, Crystal and Sponge take on Serges who is riding his platform with full shields on. The rest take on Violen*

Agile: *crosses blades with Magna* You’re good.

Magna: You too… But I will win!

Agile: *Catches Magna’s sword with his* Ah but you forget, I have a beam sword and yours is just a hunk of metal! I’m gonna melt it and you! HAHA!

*Magna uses another mine and leaps back*

Agile: AHHH! Curse you!

*Flame and Crab are firing their weapons at Violen*

Violen: Ow Ow Ow Ow…

Flame: Y’know I’ve been wondering.. I can understand everybody else’s weapon, but how can bubbles hurt you? I mean I hate it because I’m fire oriented but other than that…

Crab: I dunno.. I just shoot em.. They make pretty colors!

*Meanwhile the team attacking Serge is firing their weapons non-stop but to no avail*

Moth: This isn’t working!

Overdrive: Tell me about it genius!

Serges: Hah! If I don’t move out of the shield I don’t get hurt! Why didn’t I think of that before?

Sponge: Must be Alzheimer’s Disease…

*This goes on for a while*

Agile: You can’t run forever! I’m faster than you!

Magna: But I’m smarter! *Jumps from a pile of trash only to lose his footing and tumbles down and lands on his head*

Magna: Ooook.. that wasn’t smart.

Flame: Magna!

*Flame and Crab are hit with the medicine ball and are thrown into Magna. This distracts the other CIA members and they get sent flying in that direction thanks to a beam from Serges*

Serges: HA! Now we have you cornered!

Violen: Serges! The bubbles hurt!

Agile: Shut up man! We’re about to win here.

*Just then Wheel Gator emerges from the manhole right behind the CIA hunt..er the X-Hunters. Near toxic fumes are visible and they are streaming off his body*

Gator: Hey nice landing place! You wouldn’t believe what I found in there, and..hey what’s going on?

Serges: GAAK thats the worst smell I’ve ever smelled.. At least I think so..

Magna: Gator! Help!

Gator: I got this covered. *BUUUUUUUUUUUURP*

*Multiple things happen all at once: Agile drops his sword on his foot as he grasps his nose and mouth. Violen starts to spaz out and puts a few dents into himself. Serges’s platform starts to malfunction. He jumps off as it starts to spark and it sails off into a large pile of trash and explodes, showering everybody with garbage.*

Serges: RETREAT!

*And just as quickly as they came, they take off*

Violen: X-Hunters are blasting off again… *Agile smacks him across the back of his head*

Serges: This never happened ok?

Sponge: So I guess we won.

Crab: YAY! I’m covered in garbage!

Overdrive: I’m going to be sick

Gator: You guys owe me. Big time!

Magna: No you just did your part as a team member.

Crystal: Bullsh..uhhhh *Yawn* He saved our butts.

Gator: Ah don’t worry about it. At least now I can ride with you guys.. Since your all covered with trash now. Heh.

Moth: Just let me fix the van.. Lucky thing we landed here,I can make all the things we need real fast. I’ll be done with the repairs in a few minutes. *Starts using powers on junk*

Flame: What was it that you ate that caused such a thing to happen?

Gator: I found a nest of mutant frogs.. So I ate em.

Overdrive: You had to ask! If you need me I’m going over behind that pile of junk to puke my guts out.

Moth: All done! Everybody hop in.

*And so everybody gets in the fixed van and heads off toward the city*

Flame: We are really going to have to clean this thing later.

The E–

Rebel: WAAAAAAIT!

Void: What?

Rebel: Street Performing? This is the best we could come up with?

Void: Just shut up and keep dancing Mr. I-won’t-look-for-a-job.. Besides.. we all stink from the battle in the dump.

Rebel: Why do WE have to dance?

Void: Because Outlaw and PBX are doing a magic show, GDT and Ti-An are doing music, Ghaleon and Deathtuna are doing a fire show.. Well Ghal is.. DT just has his shell out to get the money while he sleeps on the sidewalk.

Rebel: I hate this ending….

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