*It was a normal day in the Code: Island Attackers island base. However, the main theme wasn’t there, nor was it in the daytime. Instead, it was elsewhere, deep within the center of Megalopolis…*
???: Is everyone here?
Frank: I am.
???: What about the boy?
Frank: *Shrugs* Guess he got lost again.
???: Damn it all! We can’t afford any mistakes this late in the game!
Frank: Yeah, yeah. Sorry about all of that. But, hey, at least we managed to eliminate the major competition, eh?
???: …I suppose…
Frank: Why the heck are you still all shrouded in mystery, anyway?
???: What do you mean?
Frank: Well, no offense, but it HAS been since the end of the last series*.
*See Series 1, Epilogue #13 “Game Over”
???: Bah. I will make my grand appearance once that blasted boy shows up on time for once!
Frank: Should I go find him?
???: Just hurry it up. I’m already six epilogues behind schedule!
*Now, it was the next day, at the CIA’s base. The members were all in the kitchen, eating.*
Rebel: Mm-mmm. This sure is some good stuff.
Void: I’ll say. Who did made it today? Shadowstrike?
Shadowstrike: Dude, I’ve been at the table this whole time.
Deathtuna: *Under the table, sucking on his thumb*
Void: Please tell me that Majin decided to put beer in this.
Outlaw: *Walks into the room* Hey guys! Sure am glad you enjoy my cooking so much. Boy, was I getting scared that you all would never get used to eating–
Rebel and Void: *Throws up*
PBX: Yay! Dry heaves!
Ghaleon: *Puts the dishes in the dishwasher* So, what’s on todays schedule? Saving the trees?
Rebel: …Trees? I thought they were all cut down years ago.
Ghaleon: No! That’s only what they WANT you to think! There are still real trees out there! It’s all a conspiracy set up by the government!
Phoenix Wright: HE’S LYING DAMN IT AND I CAN PROVE IT!!
Phoenix: What? He is. And I can. *flashes his attorney badge* Phoenix Wright. Attorney at law. Call me if you ever need any help. *leaves*
Void: As much as I love random characters popping out of nowhere, I figured today would be a great day to just go and…
PBX: Are we going to the beach?!
PBX: Ooooooh. I see. I need to go take a bath first. I got ya. *winks and runs off*
Outlaw: Ew. Clean. That word is awful.
Ghaleon: I think it’s nice.
Void: That it is!
Rebel: *Shoves Void out of the way* Whatever! I’m not cleaning! I’m my own man! It’s either my way or the highway, and I’m choosing both, because that’s where I’m headed. *grabs a coke and leaves*
Deathtuna: *Wakes up* Yawn, that was a good nap. *goes back to sleep*
Shadowstrike: So, um… should we go after him?
Void: Nah. We’ve got a base to clean!
Majin: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THEY WILL NOT TAKE ME BACK *rolls along the floor screaming*
PBX: *Runs out with an innertube on* I’M READY!!
Void: *Slaps self*
*In downtown Megalopolis…*
Rebel: Hmm, what to do, what to do, what to do… say, I’ve got an idea! Lemme check out the movie theater. Maybe they’ll have something good! *goes to the theater* Excuse me! I’ll have one ticket for… wow. Star Wars Episode Thirty? Didn’t know they would pump money out all the way to that episode. Sounds pretty interesting! I’ll take it!
Clerk: *Hands him the ticket*
*Ten minutes later*
Obi-Wan: Now remember, Luke. The power of the Force must be strong within you.
Rebel: No shit, sherlock.
Luke: No shit, sherlock.
Rebel: …When the heck does a Star Wars character cuss?
Luke: *Proceeds to screw Leia*
Rebel: *Gouges his eyes* AAAAAGGGGGHH OH MY GOD MY VIRGIN EYES!! *runs outside* What was that… that… THAT?! *looks at the poster* Wait a sec, that wasn’t a Star Wars 30! That was a freakin’ porno! Oh my God… I will never be able to look at Star Wars the same way again… *shudders uncontrollably*
Frank: Where are we now?
Rebel: Huh? *looks out the window*
Ryouga Hibiki: *Pulls out a map* Well, according to this map, we should be somewhere in Tokyo…
Frank: Gimme that map. *takes it away and looks at it* …You idiot! This is a map of Kentucky!
Ryouga: I was wondering why the oceans were named Ohio and Tennessee…
Frank: We’re six–count ’em, SIX–epilogues off schedule, and here we are: lost! Lost, I tell you! Oh, why couldn’t we have found someone who didn’t have a piss-poor sense of direction?!
Ryouga: Hey, wait a minute! It’s not like I asked for any of this to happen!
Frank: You’re right. But nonetheless I feel like blaming my pain and misery on you, so SUCK IT UP YA WUSS!
Ryouga: *Growls under his breath*
Rebel: *To himself* Sheesh. Frank. I’d be better off not getting into a fight with him. I’ll just go the other way… *knocks over a trashcan*
Frank: What the heck was that noise?
Ryouga: Beats me.
Frank: Wait right here! *knocks the wall down* Ack! Rebel?! W-what are you doing here?!
Ryouga: *Pulls out another map* Rebel? Why the heck would he be all the way over in Tokyo?
Rebel: Hey, Mr. Brilliant. That’s a map of the former Soviet Union.
Ryouga: …I knew that. *puts the map away*
Frank: Curses! We cannot afford to let our plans be revealed yet! Ryouga! Get him!
Ryouga: What about you?
Frank: Er… uh, well… Unlike you, I have a good sense of direction, so… ta-ta! *flies away*
Rebel: Oh please. What the heck could one kid possibly do–
Ryouga: Bakusaitenketsu!! *blasts a hole in the ground*
Rebel: Oh crap!!
*Rebel gets caught in the explosion and goes flying, crashing into a nearby building.*
Ryouga: Get back here, coward! *runs off in the wrong direction*
Rebel: Ugh… I have no idea what he just said, but something tells me that he has no clue where the heck he is going. I’m gonna have to exploit that weakness!
Ryouga: Huh. I could have sworn he went off somewhere in this direction… *feels something hit him* What the?!
Rebel: Ergh, the shurikens bounced off? What kind of blasphemy is this?!
Ryouga: There you are!!
Ryouga: *Tears off a couple of bandannas and throws them*
Rebel: …Something tells me I shouldn’t sneeze at those. *a bandanna lodges into his chest* Nope. Definitely not sneeze at them.
Ryouga: *Throws some more*
Rebel: Eep! *disappears*
Ryouga: Grr… show yourself!
Rebel: *Behind him* Magnet Mines!
Ryouga: *Gets blown clear across the street*
Rebel: Hah! In your face, punk!
Ryouga: *Gets back up and charges*
Rebel: *Runs away screaming*
???: Ah, good. You’re finally here. Now, where is the boy, Ryouga?
Frank: Eh… I’ve got some good news, and some bad news.
???: What’s the bad news?
Frank: Rebel is onto us.
???: *Growls* So what’s the good news?
Frank: Oh, well… I manage to find Ryouga.
???: And just where is he?!
Frank: Fighting Rebel.
???: *Sets Frank on fire*
Frank: AAAHHHHHHH WATER!!! *runs to the bathroom*
???: I have had enough of this nonsense! We have wasted enough time! It is time to put our plans into action!!
*At the CIA base*
Void: C’mon, guys! Don’t sit around watching TV all day!
Outlaw: Sorry. Family Fued.
Shadowstrike: Must watch.
Void: No. If you insist on wasting a perfectly good day of cleaning, then you are going to watch something educational, like the news! *changes the channel*
Ghaleon: *Gets on his knees* Now we’ll never know if poor Tiny Tim will ever get that giant roasted turkey for Christmas!
Void: Quiet everyone. Some important announcement is about to play…
Anchorman: Today, the city of Megalopolis has reached a state of total destruction. As shown in the image, the tallest of all buildings are falling apart, and the streets are in utter turmoil, as people run without aim. The source of this carnage has already been identified, however, and officials plan to unleash a full-scale assualt. Here is an image of the source. *flashes an image of Rebel and Ryouga sticking their tongues out at the camera* If you see these two individuals, then run away. And be afraid.
*A moment of silence ensues*
Void: …My God. This horrible…
PBX: I’m not wearing any underwear today, guys!
Outlaw: Yeah, that is pretty bad.
Void: Concentrate! Rebel is out there with some kid destroying the entire city! We have to go out there and do something!
Shadowstrike: But shouldn’t we follow that advice and run away instead?
Void: No! Don’t you guys see? We’re super heroes! We’re supposed to be preventing this sort of destruction, not allowing it to continue!
Everyone else: …
Void: So what do you all say, guys? Let’s go out there and win one for the team!
PBX: I CALL SHOTGUN.
Deathtuna: Zzz… carry me… Zzz…
Void: *Watches everyone leave* Oh well. At least they’re doing something.
*Back in a Megalopolis skyscraper*
Ryouga: Give it up. You cannot win. Resistance is futile.
Rebel: What the Hell are you, the freaking Borg?
Ryouga: *Destroys the ground, followed by a volley of bandannas*
Rebel: Craaaaaaaap!! *jumps out of the explosion, but gets pelted by bandannas*
Ryouga: Shishihoukoudan!! *fires a large ki-blast*
*Rebel attempts to dodge it, but appears to get thrown out out of the building*
Ryouga: *Jumps after him*
Rebel: *Grabs him by the collar* Heh, magnetic boots kid. I can make like Spider Man and cling onto buildings as long as I–
Ryouga: *Headbutts Rebel*
Rebel: …Go die. *drops Ryouga*
Ryouga: *Hits the ground head-first*
Rebel: Oooh, that’s smarts. You okay?
Ryouga: Grr… PREPARE TO DIE!! *throws multiple bandannas*
Rebel: Is that all you can do?! *dodges*
Ryouga: You want something new? Fine!! *tears out a street light*
Rebel: Oh, HELL no–*gets clobbered upside the head*
Ryouga: Now, it is time to finish this! Bakusaitenketsu–
Ryouga: What now?!
Shadowstrike: Holy crap, Rebel. You look horrible.
Rebel: *On the ground* Shut your pie hole.
Void: Don’t worry, Rebel. We watched the news and saw you two destroying everything in sight.
PBX: We’re here to save you!
Rebel: Gee, thanks. You guys make me feel so much better. *rolls eyes*
Ryouga: So, you have to resort to ganging up on me to win? You’re all even more weak than I thought.
Ghaleon: Say, now. We aren’t here to pick a fight.
Ryouga: *Blasts Ghaleon into submission*
PBX, Rebel, Void, Outlaw, Shadowstrike, Deathtuna, and Majin: …
Ryouga: …PREPARE TO DIE!!
Everyone else: Huh?
Frank: Everyone, prepare to tremble in terror, for we have finally arrived!
Void: Wait, Frank? What are you doing here? You’re not supposed to be able to go past the boundary limits which I programmed into you…
Frank: Ah, yes. Creator. As you can plainly see, I have evolved FAR beyond that.
Shadowstrike: Just what the heck is he talking about, anyway?
Deathtuna: No clue…
???: Allow me to explain.
Rebel: Just who are you supposed to be?
Frank: I think it’s time you ditched the mysterious question marks.
???: I suppose so. Very well, I am…
Ghaleon: *Crashes back down to Earth* Ow…
Narrator: Just who is this mysterious character? What is up with the question marks? Is my interruption pissing ANYONE off?
Rebel: I thought I fired you.
Narrator: Regardless, all of you shall find out next time…
Rebel: No, NO!! THIS EPILOGUE ISN’T OVER YET DAMNIT DON’T LISTEN TO HIM!!
Narrator: Next time, on Code: Island Attackers!!
Rebel: WE STILL HAVE A CLIFFHANGER NO DON’T END IT… *gets dragged off by the others*
To Be Continued… (not)
Narrator: *slides the “To Be Continued” sign out of the way* Last time, the mysterious figure was about to reveal himself, but with a well placed interruption by yours truly…
Rebel: Go to Hell.
Narrator: We have delayed the second part–Until now! Just who is he? What does he want? Apparently, Frank and Ryouga are working for him… I can hardly wait!
Rebel: If that was the case THEN YOU WOULDN’T HAVE WASTED OUR TIME WITH THAT INTERRUPTION!!
Narrator: Oh, shush.
*The narrator pushes a button which rewinds the previous events. He eventually stops rewinding at the part right when Frank suggests that the mystery man reveals himself…*
Frank: I think it’s time you ditched the mysterious question marks.
???: I suppose so. Very well, I am…
Ghaleon: *Crashes back down to Earth* Ow… Again.
Anti-Majin: That’s right! It is I, the great lord of evil, Anti-Majin!
Anti-Majin: That’s right. It’s me. Remember?
Majin: nope i got nuthin
Anti-Majin: I am the anti version of yourself!!
Void: Just what are you two planning? Together?
Anti-Majin: Hah! Thought you would never ask!
PBX: Thinking is a hard thing to do. I tried it once, but I only got static.
Frank: Shut up, you stupid little crab.
Anti-Majin: My–I mean, OUR–plan is simple! I have made only one lousy appearance in these damn epilogues for nothing!
Shadowstrike: Can you hurry it up? I have things I’ve gotta do… places to go… and stuff.
Anti-Majin: Silence!! I was getting to that!! *clears his throat* Ahem, anyway… The reason why I haven’t been bothering you like the other villains was simply because I was ingeniusly biding my time behind the scenes. I’ve been doing so from the very beginning!
Outlaw: The very beginning?
Anti-Majin: That’s right! Don’t you wonder why things happened the way they were? Ti-An’s disappearance, the X-Hunters downfall, the real CIA’s collapse, Trump’s arrest… It was all MY doing! Oh, and of course, why Frank is now out and about on his own accord.
Void: Frank, I am so disappointed in you. I know you’ve always hated us, but going so far as to betray us?
Frank: Shut up! Thanks to Anti-Majin’s true powers, I have been capable of breaking free of the one limitation which prevented me from unleashing my full potential! Besides, I am technically classified as a villain, so if I want to team up with other villains, then I have so much as that right!
Rebel: What the Hell about Mr. Emotional over there?
Ryouga: Hey! I resent that remark!
Rebel: I resent you.
Anti-Majin: Ah, yes. Ryouga. He suffers from a lack of no direction, as well as a cu–
Frank: *Whispers* He doesn’t really want that weakness to be exploited.
Anti-Majin: Oh, right. Well, he suffers from some very serious problems, and I promised that if he agreed to help me accomplish his goals, I will cure him of all that ailes him!
Majin: *Sobering up* Uh… wait… you can’t do…
Anti-Majin: Enough!! I have already finished my explanation! Now, it is time to finish this!
Rebel: Pfft, we’ve beaten you before. I’m fairly certain that we (we as in the rest of the team) can handle this with no–
Anti-Majin: *Blasts Rebel*
PBX, Ghaleon, Void, Outlaw, Shadowstrike, Deathtuna, and Majin: …
Anti-Majin: I’m sorry, shall we continue?
Frank: Allow me to start off…
Anti, Frank and Ryouga: What?!
Rebel: *Crawls back* If you think I’m gonna let YOU guys start this random battle… then you’ve been smokin’ something! And I want some!
Anti-Majin: We’re high on life, friend.
Rebel: Whatever. Island Attackers… ATTA–
Frank: *Blasts Rebel*
PBX, Ghaleon, Void, Outlaw, Shadowstrike, Deathtuna, and Majin: …
Anti-Majin: Now where were we again? Oh yes. After you, Frank.
Rebel: Hold it right there!
Anti-Majin: …You’re kidding. You’re still alive?!
Rebel: If you think that these large gaping holes in my body can hurt me more than being dipped in a vat of pepsi, then you’ve got another thing coming!
Ryouga: *Lifts a pepsi truck over his head and tosses it on Rebel*
Anti-Majin: Thank you, Ryouga. Now–
Rebel: Not so fast!!
Anti-Majin: God damnit, CAN’T YOU JUST STAY DEAD?!
Rebel: Sorry, I’ve watched Zero and Sigma die too many times to not catch onto these tricks.
Anti-Majin: Whatever! I don’t care anymore! Let’s get them!
Void: Look alive Rebel, and help us out here!
Rebel: …You’re joking. I don’t even have legs anymore. You expect me to fight like this?!
Outlaw: He does have a point.
Void: Oh well. Let’s go get ’em!
Frank: *In the air* Hah hah, you fools can never defeat us all together! *fires all of the CIA’s weapons at their respective targets*
Void: *Dodges the flames* I should have just dismantled you when I had the–*gets punched in the face*
Ryouga: C’mon, brainiac! PREPARE TO–*dodges some chains* What was that?!
Majin: *Sober* You’ll have to deal with me, also!
Ryouga: Grr… *destroys the ground beneath them*
Majin and Void: Ack!! *gets thrown back*
Anti-Majin: *Flying* Fools… we are the strongest in the world. What chance do you have to stop us? I’ll answer that for you–none!
Shadowstrike: Oh yeah?
Outlaw: *Grabs PBX and hurls him at Anti*
Anti-Majin: *Knocks PBX out of the way*
*Close by, a hot air balloon shaped like Serge’s hat comes into view*
Agile: Oooh, I absolutely love this new hot air balloon, Serges!
Serges: Thanks. I built it all from cheap, thrown away parts at the recycling center!
Violen: I feel sick… *turns green*
Agile: So, I take it we’re gonna use this bad boy and assault the Island Attackers?
Serges: You bet! Since they only have one flyer, that means they’ll be at a disadvantage! *laughs maniacally*
Agile: *Joins him*
Violen: *Points at the fight* Say… what’s that over there?
Agile and Serges: SHUT UP!!
Agile: Look Violen, the grown-ups are discussing something very important here.
Serges: In other words, shut your damn face before we take that medicine ball of yours and shove it down your throat.
Agile and Serges: Huh?
*The X-Hunters look over just in time to see PBX crash into their balloon, as his sharp pincers pop the material. The X-Hunters lose control and go flying into the distance.*
Agile: NOO!! THE ISLAND ATTACKERS DEFEATED US AGAIN!!
Violen: I TOLD YOU!!
Serges: SHUT UP!!
X-Hunters: WE’RE BLASTING OFF AGAIN…! *ding*
PBX: Bye! *gets blasted from above* Aaack!!
Anti-Majin: Did you forget about me?! *continues his assault*
Outlaw: Hold on, little buddy! *pulls out a Spin Wheel and throws it at Anti*
Anti-Majin: Again with the same old trick… allow me to educate you. *grabs the wheel out of midair and charges it with electricity before throwing it back*
Ghaleon: *takes the blow for Outlaw*
Ghaleon: I’m… fine… *collapses*
Anti-Majin: Hah, that’s another down, and only five more to go!
Shadowstrike: *Fires a barrage of Sonic Slicers toward Frank* Let’s see you handle that!
Frank: Is that all? How boring! *allows the Slicers to pass through him harmlessly*
Shadowstrike: The Hell?!
Deathtuna: I can handle ‘im! *freezes Frank* Now, Shadow!
*Both Shadow and Deathtuna fire a volley of Slicers and Hunters at Frank, who takes the full force of the attack. As the dust clears, they see that Frank is still standing, with not even a scratch on him.*
Frank: It seems as though you nitwits forgot that I am a Grade-A godmodder! Now, it is my turn.
Shadowstrike: Watch out!!
*In a flash, Frank lunges forward with two Spin Wheels, each headed toward a CIA member. Shadowstrike, anticipating the attack, manages to dodge, but watches as Deathtuna, who is slower, get caught and his brutally slashed and cut up.*
Deathtuna: *Hits the ground* Ugh…
Shadowstrike: Tuna!! *gets elbowed from behind*
Frank: Yes, yes! We are winning! *looks over at Ryouga* Hurry it up, boy!
Ryouga: SHUT UP!! *lunges at Majin*
Majin: *Dodges* Whoa! You’re pretty tough!
Ryouga: Of course I am. I’ve had special training.
Majin: o rly?
Ryouga: ya rly
Majin: o rly?
Ryouga: not rly *knees Majin*
Majin: OSNAPZ!! *keels over and passes out*
*At that point realization struck the CIA. With most of the members down and out, the only ones who were still concious were Outlaw, Void, and Rebel, and Rebel was currently crippled. That left Outlaw and Void to fight by themselves.*
Void: You guys won’t get away with this!
Frank: Foolish creator! Isn’t it already obvious that we have won, and you have lost?
Outlaw: No offense, Void… but this doesn’t look too good.
Rebel: HEY!! I am not about to accept our first ever defeat!
Ryouga: Get over it, loser!
Rebel: What’d you say–
Anti-Majin: As much as I’d love to continue this, we have people to kill, places to destroy. Namely, you and your base.
Void: No, you wouldn’t…
Frank: We would! And it starts now! Hahahah!!
Outlaw: …Take this!! *charges*
Anti-Majin: A futile attempt. *grabs Outlaw and hurls him up into the sky* Frank, would you do me the honor?
*Frank fires twin Strike Chains at Outlaw, that quickly connect and start to drain his energy. By the time Outlaw hits the earth, he had fallen unconcious.*
Anti-Majin: And now… for you. *he points two fingers at Void*
Void: Blast! *Tries to get away, but is frozen* Wh-what is this…?
Anti-Majin: Do you like it? I can easily freeze your wings in place with minimal effort.
Void: Anti-Majin… I won’t forget this…
Anti-Majin: *Laughs maniacally* What’s that? You won’t forget my name? You’re too kind. *fires a laser through Void’s chest*
Void: *Falls to the ground*
Frank: Welp, guess that settles things. All that’s left is the base itself, right?
Anti-Majin: Yes. We should hurry. Come, Ryouga. You can help by tearing up the foundation.
Ryouga: *Glances over at Rebel* What about him? He’s still alive.
Anti-Majin: Bah, we don’t have time to waste on the likes of him. He’ll die eventually from his own wounds. *leaves*
Frank and Ryouga: *Follows*
Rebel: Umm… hello? I don’t want to die a slow and painful death! Seriously! …Damn it all.
*The dastardly trio heads to the Island Attacker’s base… An hour later, destruction fills the air.*
Anti-Majin: Hahahah!! Fall, fall! Finally, the Island Attackers, along with that pesky good version of myself, have been defeated! Nothing can stop me now!
Frank: At this rate, the base will be gone by morning.
Frank: What of Ryouga?
Anti-Majin: What about him?
Frank: He’ll be expecting a cure for his curse very soon.
Anti-Majin: Oh, that. Well, I may have lied to him about that, but as long as we have reasons for him to continue serving us, then I doubt there will be much reason to worry.
Anti-Majin: Now, to start with phase two of my notorious plan…
Anti-Majin: Yes–in the place of this ugly base, I shall build a castle that shall represent me and my power!! Hahah!!
Frank: …And what of me?
Anti-Majin: Oh, erm… yes… What would you like?
Frank: Let me see…
*Back with Rebel…*
Rebel: God, I can’t believe this happening… Everything has just gone WRONG. Oh, but wait…! *pulls out a small device* Void gave this thing to me in case of an emergency. All I’ve gotta do is push this button here, and… *pushes*
*Out of nowhere a strange creature drops from the sky. It appeares like a dinosaur, but it has several bird-like features to it, such as feathers and a beak. To put it simply it was a cross between a Yoshi and a Chocobo–a Yoshobo.*
Rebel: …The heck? Is this some sort of joke?
Rebel: VOID!! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!
Yoshobo: *Starts pecking Rebel’s one good eye*
Rebel: Ow, hey, stop that you stupid little freak!
Yoshobo: *Warks again, louder*
Rebel: Oh, what? You want something to eat? Fine… whatever. *pulls out a bag of gummy worms* This is all I have on me. Knock yourself out.
*The moment Rebel hands over the bag the Yoshobo starts digging into candy like mad, making disgusting and unusual slurping noises. Rebel can only watch in horror.*
Rebel: Oh… the memories… *closes his eye* The memories of Outlaw eating that kitten… I will never sleep again…
Rebel: Shut up, freak! I’m not in the mood! Everyone is dead, I’m bleeding my god damn internal organs out, the bad guys are destroying our base, and now you keep warking in my fucking ear!
Rebel: DFRHAISHTIELSTHRH DO SOMETHING USEFUL!!
*As if by command, seven more Yoshobos–all composed of different colors–appear and grab a CIA member, and then take off into the distance at full speed. Where their destination goes, nobody knows, except for those silly old Yoshobos.*
To Be Continued…