Dissed in the Digital World (Part 3)

*Written by Dark Knight*

At the Maverick HQ…

ANIME MASTER: And what was the little “gift”, if I may ask, Sigma?

SIGMA: Some nice new “pets” for them, which a mercenary hired by me gladly accepted to deliver to their base.

JADE: Who was he? Remember our last problems with mercenary guys hiding within the shadows…

BRICK: Hey, but one of them was none other than me!

SIGMA: Don’t worry, my loyal Mavericks, he was pure human. You know, flesh and bone, with no apparent weapons.

——————————————

Back in the CIA airship…

REBEL: Dorumon’s right, we should welcome you to the team.

METABAD: WOOHOO! LET’S RAAawwk…zzz…(falls asleep)

LILAMON: Don’t worry, I have him under control.

DK: That was a pretty good pollen attack, Lila-chan, but leave it so. I don’t think he’s TOO dangerous.

STRIKEDRAMON: I think I should thank you too.

DK: Ok, now that we’re on the topic I need to tell you guys something…

MAJIN: FLYING PINK ELEPHANTS OUTSIDE!!! RAK! RAK! RAK! (runs through a wall and falls out of the airship)

KYUUBIMON: Shouldn’t we help him?

VOID: Nah. Let him go. Proceed.

DK: Well, I think I should start from the beginning. I’m in fact a specter, a dead man, with no knowledge of my past life nor the reason of my death. My first remembrances are of my soul floating, stranded beetwen the dimensions of the Outer World, in total despair, sorrow and no reasons to continue existing. Then something appeared, some entity so horrific I can’t remember what it was.

VOID: Not even its shape?

DK: Only prime terror comes to my mind. Then the feeling of a part of my soul beign ripped from me. After that the ultimate feeling of fear dissapeared, and I found myself alone again, but this time on this world. I wandered some time as a lost soul through this world, and when I regained some strength, created this human body you see now. But as you surely know, artificially created human bodies are fragile. And this one is decaying, slowly but continuously. I needed a new body, a more durable one. So this was the reason (besides getting cute Lila-chan) I came here.

VOID: Mm… interesting story. I never heard of something similar. Rebel, give him the Bubble Crab armor.

REBEL: I’m the leader, Void! So I’m the one who gives the ord…

VOID: He’s dying, so please take that for later!

REBEL: Ok, ok…asshole.

Later, after giving DK the powers and form of Bubble Crab…

DK: Aah, feels good! It was sooo long since I felt so renewed, but somehow I sense lack of life in my body… no problem, I don’t care about that.

REBEL: So… the Island Attackers are reunited again!

DK: Ha, it was a good idea to bring the Devidramon here, so I could save your life, giving you the moral obligation to repay me the favor!

EVERYONE ELSE EXCEPT LILAMON: YOU BASTARD!!!!

DK: MWAHAHAHA!!!!

LILAMON: Oh, DK-san, please don’t start with that again!

METABAD: HEY GUYS!! What did I miss?? Some RAWKIN’, perhaps?!?!? (rawks)

DK stares at the rawkin’ Metabad with a mix of wicked fun and insanity.

DK: THIS!!! (shoots Bubble Splash at him)

METABAD: AAH!!! THE PAAAIIIN, IT HUURTSS!!!! MY ASS IS MELTING!!!

DK: HAHA!!! This is so much fun!!! (shoots even more)

METABAD: BWAAAAAA!!!!

DK begins to pursue Metabad, who screams like a little girl while running.

LILAMON: Guess this will take a while…

——————————————

Meanwhile, in an alternate dimension, Lilithmon is speaking with some entity who’s wearing a black cloak…

LILITHMON: I say, give me the Chaos Emeralds, I know you have two of them!

CLOAKED FIGURE: And I say, I don’t have them!

LILITHMON: Chaos Messenger, don’t lie to me! Lying to a Great Demon Lord will be your last and worst fault.

CLOAKED FIGURE: Hey sweety, trust me! Chaos to me is a very different thing than of the jewels you’re searching. We don’t need those things.

LILITHMON: You are evil like us, and the sons of the darkness help themselves, so bring them to me!

CLOAKED FIGURE: Lilithmon, you know the role of our cult in this big game we know as Existence. We are not dark nor light. And while the battle between the forces of Good and Evil occurs, we watch silently from the shadows, waiting for our turn to enter into the game. Believe me, I don’t have those things.

LILITHMON: Our sources informed us that a Chaos Messenger with the same Sirrakh Symbol as yours keeps two of them. This is my last warning. I know your Master won’t appear to save a mere subordinate.

CLOAKED FIGURE: C’mon, I won’t harm a girl.

LILITHMON: (Giggles) Wanna test that?

CLOAKED FIGURE: Well, I think I can no longer hide the truth, specially to a girl as pretty as you. In fact, I posessed two of them as you said, but not anymore. Some miserable, pussy black rodent stole them from my grasp while I was distracted. I’m pissed with him, and wanting to devour his soul. No one humilliates a Chaos Messenger and survives!

LILITHMON: How can we find him?

CLOAKED FIGURE: Frankly, I don’t know where the little shit can be now. Only his name… Shadow the Hedgehog.

LILITHMON: That’s enough for us to track him. In reward for the info you gave us, I shall personally kill him for you.

CLOAKED FIGURE: That seems good… but I was wanting some different type of reward from you, Lilithmon…

LILITHMON: What?

CLOAKED FIGURE: Nothing! Good luck.

After Lilithmon left…

CLOAKED FIGURE: Well, I think it’s time to return there and see how her progress is going on. I hope the best, hehehe…

——————————————

Elsewhere…

iX: (Blasts a Pichu)

BARBAMON: Did you find the Chaos Emerald?

iX: No, but this is damn fun!!!!

EGGMAN: iX, how can you even think that the Chaos Emerald we’re searching here will be inside one of those critters? It doesn’t have any sense!

iX: That’s not your freakin’ problem, fatball! (continues blasting Pokemon)

BARBAMON: Leviamon should be here in a moment, he’s traveled to a dimension with people who use the power of the alchemy. (EGGMAN and iX continue arguing) Don’t let pointless infighting interrupt our grand plan! We must focus at the task at hand.

EGGMAN: I can’t work with morons!

iX: Me neither.

EGGMAN: Besides, I think I know the reason why you let iX kill Pok…

Just before he can say any more words, Leviamon appears.

LEVIAMON: Nothing there. But I saw the presence of another kind of very powerful stones, and a big presence of the Deadly Sins there as well!

BARBAMON: Interesting. A pity you didn’t find any Emerald.

LEVIAMON: By the way, where’s Lilithmon?

BARBAMON: She went to meet some contact who could have some info for us, and insisted that she wanted to go alone. She must be here… now.

LILITHMON: Wow, you’re good at this, Barbamon.

LEVIAMON: Did you find any Chaos Emerald?

LILITHMON: My contact said he doesn’t have them. But he gave me some valuable info…

Meanwhile, iX is having some fun.

ASH: Pikachu, I choose you!

Pikachu attacks iX with all his electrical power. However, iX doesn’t even flinch.

iX: My turn, yellow rat…

Pikachu is totally obliterated by a charged Triad Thunder.

iX: Now that’s a TRUE electrical attack! (maniacal laugh)

ASH: PIKACHU!!!

iX: I think you’re only good against Team Rocket, loser.

ASH: Shit!

TRUMP: And by the way, you’re fired.

ASH: Double shit!

BARBAMON: iX, Trump, Eggman, we’re leaving now! Another emerald awaits us… Leviamon!

LEVIAMON: (devouring some Jigglypuff) Sorry.

——————————————

At the outskirts of the Maverick HQ…

GEEMEL: Keeheehe! We’ll take ’em by surprise!

ZAIN: Yeah! This will be a devastating blow for those villains. They’ll fear the Shadow Hunters!

TECHNO: Quiet you two! We’re in the middle of an infiltration mission to sabotage the Maverick Mainframe, did you forget it? And I will have my revenge against that armored bastard.

At the lounge of the Maverick Base…

VILE: The heck! What kind of experiment is this? All what I can see are eight lazy morons playing with their new pets! Don’t you know they are only a bad copy of Pokemon?

JADE: (preparing his Homing Torpedo mounts) DON’T

DARK KNIGHT: (taking his Boomerang Cutter headpart) EVER

JADE: SAY

DARK KNIGHT: THAT

JADE: AGAIN.

VILE: You won’t attack me.

JADE/DARK KNIGHT: BELIEVE US.

VILE: (nervous) You’re lucky today, because I’ve got many important jobs for Sigma to do, and I’m late. Expect some Champion’s Training when I see you two again! (leaves)

RYUUDAMON: (Laughs)

JADE: By the way, where were you all this time, Boomer?

DARK KNIGHT: In the bathroom?

Meanwhile, Anime Master, Bearmon, Spark, Elecmon and Brick are watching TV…

BEARMON: Hey, AM, this is a great movie, I love those energy swords! And by the way, why does the cool bounty hunter in the movie look almost similar to the guy that fled very scared of your angry friends just a moment ago?

AM: That’s an enigma I still can’t answer.

BRICK: Hey, Kamemon, where are our beers?

KAMEMON: Right here, sir.

SPARK: Hey, Brick, let the poor turtle enjoy his moments here.

BRICK: Haven’t you seen Digimon Savers? He’s pretty good for the job! I’m sure he likes it!

KAMEMON: (Somebody save me from this tyrannical penguin!)

AM: Well, I’m enjoying now the NON-DUBBED Digimon Savers. It will be a terrible thing if that Jack Bauer sicko starts profaning it (trembles with disgust).

ELECMON: What’s so bad about that guy?

SPARK: (whispers the awful truth in his ear)

ELECMON: (fainst with high terror in his eyes)

AM: Hey, monkey boy, don’t start traumatizing the boy so soon!

SPARK: How did you call me, peanut brain?

AM: Alright, that does it!

SPARK: So it is fight that you want, huh?

AM and Spark start an all-out fight in the middle of the lounge, while the rest of the Mavericks and their partners (except Seadragon, Piyomon, Blackbelt and Picodevimon, who weren’t there) stand around them, watching the big fight.

DARKSAGE: Hehe… my time has come again… (sets up a betting table) Step right up and place your bets! Will the Mammoth stomp the monkey or will Spark turn his face into a Picasso painting?

COMMANDRAMON: Make your decision and place your bets now!

DARKSAGE: Hey, boy, you’ll succeed in this work! You learn quickly!

COMMANDRAMON: Thanks. I also like to play online poker.

DARKSAGE: YOU’RE MY LOST SON!

Seadragon comes across the corridor accompanied by a tired Piyomon.

SEADRAGON: Now that was some good training! If that Typhoon buffon appears, me and Piyomon will personally kick his ass soooo hard… (sees the fight) What the hell is happening here?

DARK KNIGHT: (with his typical reluctant voice) They’re having some kind of fight.

SEADRAGON: Aah, like the one we have?

DARK KNIGHT: Yesss.

AM: Jump Press!

SPARK: (dodges) What? Too quick for you?

AM: Try this! (tries to smash Spark with his trunk)

Nevertheless, Spark catches his trunk and tries to execute a throw. However, AM is just too heavy for that. Viewing the fight is Bearmon too, with the still passed out Elecmon near him.

BEARMON: (sweatdrops) Intense.

ELECMON: (Wakes up. Nods sweatdropping) Very.

Meanwhile, in the heart of the Maverick HQ, at the Maverick Mainframe…

BLACKBELT: This is the Maverick Mainframe, Pico Devimon, here runs all the info of our Empire, here’s also the info about you.

PicoDevimon: Hehe, so I can evolve into that cool, powerful demon?

BLACKBELT: With the appropiate training, yes.

PicoDevimon: Sweet!

BLACKBELT: Once the evolution is complete, I think I’ll try to use the Maverick Virus on you to test how does it work with Digimon.

PicoDevimon: Sounds painful.

BLACKBELT: Well, we live with the Virus all the time, and look at us!

PicoDevimon: (I better stop asking). And what does this machine do?

BLACKBELT: Well, this is our teleport system, one of our newest additions and also one of my finest works.

PicoDevimon: How does it work?

BLACKBELT: Quite simple, it…

???: Always followed by bats, aren’t you, bastard?

BLACKBELT: Huh?

Behind Blackbelt appear three figures. One tall, other bulky with a large sword and the other simply tiny.

BLACKBELT: You! This is for bringing Windows Vista here! (prepares Plasma Shooter)

PicoDevimon: I’ll take care of them! Pico Darts! (throws)

GEEMEL: (easily evades) Pathetic. Is that the best your little friend can do for you? (tackles Pico Devimon)

PicoDevimon: Aagh! (Geemel continues pounding the hapless creature)

BLACKBELT: Crap… I guess is time to…

However, before he could do any more moves, the cutting edge of a sword appears just in front of his throat.

ZAIN: Where are you going, Armor Armarge?

BLACKBELT: Ugh… I’m still wondering how did you manage to enter here…

TECHNO: There are no impossibles for a mastermind, fool. Hehe, I never forget that last time, that moment in which you humilliated me! Was it funny for you!?!

BLACKBELT: Can’t say it wasn’t.

TECHNO: Silence! Now I will have my sweet revenge against you! You’re going to tell me where’s the self-destruction mechanism of this place!

BLACKBELT: Sure, it’s the bright, big red button.

GEEMEL: I’ll press it!

TECHNO: No, Geemel, wait…!

GEEMEL: (presses the button)

VOICE: ALERT! ALERT! INTRUDERS AT THE MAVERICK MAINFRAME!

TECHNO: Geemel you dumbass.

Back to the lounge…

VOICE: ALERT! ALERT! INTRUDERS AT THE MAVERICK MAINFRAME!

JADE: What!? Must be the Hunters! Blackbelt was there so he must be in trouble, hurry guys!

AM: But…

SPARK: But…

JADE: Oh, please, boys. Leave that for later.

DARKSAGE/COMMANDRAMON: Our business! Oh, what the hell! (fold table). All bets are off!

BRICK: So let’s kick some Hunter asses (I love to say that)!

The Alpha Movement run to the Mainframe to confront the Hunters. All except one…

PALMON: What are you waiting? We’ve got to assist them!

DARK KNIGHT: They are more than enough to confront wathever is there. Come, follow me. I’ve got primordial things to speak with you.

PALMON: Huh?

Meanwhile…

TECHNO: That was your last trick, Armadillo. Zain, kill him.

ZAIN: I’m going to enjoy this! (raises sword)

RYUUDAMON: Katana Attack!

BEARMON: Bear Fist!

COMMANDRAMON: M16 Assasin!

ELECMON: Sparkling Thunder!

KAMEMON: Met Knuckle!

PIYOMON: Spiral Twister!

Taken by surprise, Zain receives the full brunt of the combined attack.

ZAIN: Agh! It’s you! No matter you have the help of those creatures, we’ll kick your ass!

GEEMEL: It will be fast and easy!

BLACKBELT: Oh, I don’t think so.

TECHNO: Why?

BLACKBELT: Because… we Mavericks have a nice little thing we call Maverick Virus… and with its powers, we can help our new friends to DIGIVOLVE!

ZAIN: To help them to what?

BLACKBELT: This!

Blackbelt presses some buttons, and the seven Digimon begin to glow. A moment later, and they all have Digivolved.

TECHNO: What the…? Guys, protect me!

GEEMEL: We’ll do our best, but….

ZAIN: …those guys look pretty big, and surpass us in number.

So the Digimon start a big brawl against Zain and Geemel. Meanwhile, Palmon and Dark Knight walk through one of the many corridors of the Maverick Base.

PALMON: What happened, Dark Knight?

DARK KNIGHT: First of all, sorry for beign so rude with you, I’m somehow kinda nervous. What I’m going to do now is to tell you a tale. The tale of a demon. The tale of how that demon hates some hero. The tale of why that demon hates him. The tale of somehow who broke that demon’s heart. The tale of the vengeance of that demon.

PALMON: (a bit scared) Dark Knight, are you alright?

DARK KNIGHT: Guess I should start from the beginning…

Into the fray, the Digimon are finishing the battle…

GIN RYUUMON: Battle Rod Break!

GRIZZMON: Crescent Dawn!

KENTARUMON: Solar Ray!

GEEMEL: Kyah! (collapses)

BIRDRAMON: Meteor Wing!

SEALSDRAMON: Death Behind!

GAWAPPAMON: DJ Shooter!

ZAIN: Ugh! (collapses too)

BLACKBELT: Since you’re the only left, I think it’s now you, me, and Devimon.

DEVIMON: (evil grin) Hehehe, just give the word.

TECHNO: No, please, not again!

BLACKBELT: Too bad.

Blackbelt and Devimon proceed to beat the crap out if Techno. Meanwhile…

DARK KNIGHT: …so I’m still waiting the day I can finally feast upon his flesh. It’s the reason of my life!!! I WILL HAVE A SHOWDOWN AGAINST HIM!!! And she will pay too!

The eyes of Dark Knight flash with a ghostly green.

PALMON: Poor Dark Knight. But I don’t know how I can help you…

DARK KNIGHT: I shall demonstrate that I’m better than that Guardian bastard. I’ll demonstrate that the limits he afronted and used as a excuse are no matter for me! Come (whips Necro Sabre) Let its energy flow through you…

Palmon begins to glow and…

JADE: Ha! Now that was a pretty funny fight.

AM: Yeah!

BLACKBELT: Thanks, guys. I love to kick that pansy’s ass.

They walk to the lounge until they find Dark Knight. There is something odd in his face. It’s the first time they see him happy.

DARK KNIGHT: Guys, look who’s here…

——————————————

In the CIA airship…

METABAD: (lying on the ground, almost dead) Somebody help me…

DK: Now that was cool… And by the way, why not? (rawks)

To be continued…

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