Pancakes

This is one of the “Specials” that appeared on the site.  Those were usually stories that either were written in a different format, had a story that didn’t focus on the main group, or was  more on the creative side.

*Written by Void Darkheart*

*The X-Hunters Base, which is, amazingly, an actual warehouse in the middle of Oregon and not a dumpster… or a dumpster warehouse*

Violen: *watching a small portable TV showing nothing but static* Oh Lucy… the problems you get yourself into never cease to amuse me.

Agile: I have to say, after getting that TV for him, he’s become a lot more docile.

Serges: Well, it at least makes it easier on me to try and come up with some new invention so that we can get out of this dump and into an actual base.

*Serges and Agile walk away from Violen, heading down towards another end of the warehouse.*

Agile: Speaking of which, are you sure this new invention you’re making will work? It seems kind of… I don’t know… shabby.

Serges: Well I don’t have any kind of real tools or parts to use. All I’ve got is junk!

Agile: And yet the moth still seems to make better things…

Serges: The moth is also a freak of nature that doesn’t understand why junk is called JUNK!

*Agile sighed and shook his head a bit at Serges’ words before looking over at what could almost be described as a rifle had it not looked like it was patched together by tons of junk*

Agile: So this… weapon… what is it supposed to do again?

Serges: It re-programs the target into a gibbering fool of a reploid.

Agile: And if the target is already a gibbering fool of a reploid?

Serges: Then it just makes them even more so! I swear, sometimes my own genius seems to be a curse…

*Agile walked over to the rifle and took it in his hands, looking it over a bit while Serges continued to mutter to himself.*

Agile: Could this be a sword? I mean, guns and rifles aren’t nearly as personal as I would like them to be.

Serges: Hm? What do you mean? And be careful with that thing.

Agile: Please, like I would manhandle a piece of junk.

*As Agile said that, he tried to spin the rifle around in his hands, only to drop it onto the ground, where it discharged a shot off away from Serges and Agile.*

Serges: *quickly picking the rifle up* Hey! I told you to be careful!

Agile: Why? It’s a defective piece of junk if a small shock like that causes it to fire. Besides, we didn’t get hit by the shot as it was.

Violen: PANCAKES!

*The sudden cry for the flatbread prepared from a sweet batter cooked on a hot griddle or in a frying pan from their comrade caused Agile and Serges to look over at the big, lumbering red reploid. They stood their ground as he lumbered his way over to them, no trace of any kind of intelligence in his eyes.*

Violen: *grabbing Agile and Serges in his hands* PANCAKES!

Agile: Uh… Violen… you’re squeezing a bit tightly there… could you please…

Violen: PAAAAANNNNNCAAAAAAAAAAAKESSSSSSSSSS!

Serges: I’m going to go out on a hunch here and say he wants pancakes.

Agile: Maybe it was caused by your rifle that he just stomped on.

Serges: So now we have a rampaging beast craving…

Violen: PANCAKES!

*With that cry, Violen went and punched his way out of the warehouse, still holding Serges and Agile in his hands as he did so.*

Violen: Pancakes, boom, pancakes, mmmm, pancakes…

*Meanwhile, not more than ten feet away from the warehouse was an IHOP or an International House Of Pancakes for those that don’t know. A respectful distance away from the IHOP was the Whale King, parked and refueling. Inside the IHOP, though, were the members of the Island Attackers, sitting around a table and waiting for their food to show.*

Rebel: Why are we here again?

Void: Because three-eighths of the team still need something other than any old energy to continue living and you were too cheap to get a proper food processor. That, and pancakes are good.

Majin: Pancakes are made of people! PEOPLE!

Shadowstrike: No, that’s Pepsi you’re thinking of Majin.

Violen: PANCAKES!

Sean: That guy must like his pancakes.

Outlaw: I don’t see why they don’t serve the kind of pancakes my mom used to make.

Dark Knight: Because your mother was a toaster and they don’t serve rats.

Violen: PANCAKES!

Outlaw: Well that’s discrimination! What about Garbage Rat? What if he wanted to eat here?

Void: Then I guess he’d just have to eat else where. Nothing we can do about it.

Rebel: Speaking of eating, where’s our food?

Violen: PAAAAANNNNNCAAAAAAAAAAAKESSSSSSSSSS!

Metabad: You know that guy sounds like he really wants his pancakes.

Sean: Maybe someone should make sure he has some.

Rebel: His voice sound familiar though…

*It was then when the warehouse suddenly had a large hole punched into it, causing much noise and rubble.*

Metabad: That doesn’t sound like it rawked at all.

Void: Not our problem. We’re just going to eat our food when we get it, and leave.

Violen: PANCAKES!

Rebel: Wait a minute… that sounds like…

*Just as Rebel realized who was yelling, Agile and Serges go crashing into the table that the Island Attackers were sitting at, through the wall.*

Outlaw: I’d say it is our problem since these two are our villains.

Violen: *busting through what was left of the wall* PANCAKES!

Rebel: Sean, you, Dark Knight, and Outlaw go handle big red! We’ll deal with the other two here!

*The three quickly went off to go hold Violen off while Rebel bent down and picked Agile up by his throat.*

Rebel: Now tell us, what are your plans and why is Violen screaming…

Violen: PANCAKES FOR THE HORDE!

Agile: *hacks and coughs a bit* This isn’t part of any plan you wretched insect. Violen’s just insane!

Serges: *picking himself up a bit, dusting himself off at the same time* We don’t know what’s going on with Violen. One moment he’s off in Lucy Land, and the next, he’s crying out for pancakes like it was blood.

*Sean then flies by and crashes into the ground, slowly picking himself up.*

Sean: Okay… I don’t think we can hold off Violen for long on our own Rebel…

Violen: THERE IS NO VIOLEN! ONLY PANCAKES!

Metabad: Well if he wants to rawk, lets rawk.

*Metabad quickly throws of a few Speed Burners at Violen while Sean joins in with some Crystal Hunter shots. Outlaw and Dark Knight grapple with Violen, trying to hold him steady as the attacks come, struggling against his strength.*

Violen: *as the attacks strike his form, doing little damage* SYRUP FOR THE SYRUP GOD! BUTTER FOR THE BUTTER THRONE!

Shadowstrike: He’s indestructible! What have you guys done?!

Serges: We haven’t done anything to him! We certainly didn’t hit him with any kind of ray!

Rebel: Well Dr. Void, what do you suggest?

Void: Simple. We run for the ship, pray that he doesn’t follow, and find ourselves new teammates.

Majin: Why don’t we just give him pancakes like he asks for?

Rebel: I don’t know… I like Void’s plan better…

Outlaw: This is madness!

Violen: MADNESS?! THIS… IS… PANCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!

*Violen then manages throw Outlaw off of him and through a wall, grabbing Dark Knight and hurling him at Rebel. Rebel grabs Void and quickly places the moth in front of him, Dark Knight slamming into Void instead of Rebel.*

Agile: I must say, if you are going to be looking for new members, may I inquire as if we could join you?

Rebel: Nah. First thing we do is run a credit check, and I already know you two have lousy credit. Anyway, I guess we try Majin’s plan, since we can’t really get by that walking behemoth of a nut.

Sean: Okay, give me and Void some time and we can build a pancake launcher designed to stuff Violen full of pancakes.

Serges: Or you could just let him rampage around enough until he gets to where they have their pancakes stored.

*The group looks over as Violen busts through some more walls towards IHOP’s pancake storage unit, tearing it open and tearing into all of the pancakes there*

Majin: Oh the pancake-ity!

Metabad: Rawkin! We won!

Rebel: Have you ever seen a more disgusting display in your life?

Void: Remember when we used to have a base connected to the sewers?

Rebel: Good point…

*It doesn’t take Violen long before he finishes eating the pancakes and then lets out a very loud, earth shaking burp. So loud and forceful that is quickly caused the building to collapse on the group inside.*

*A few hours later, after digging themselves out of the ruined IHOP and getting back to the Whale King…*

Rebel: Okay… next time someone asks if we can stop at a restaurant like that, I’m going to just say no, and have us speed by it.

Void: Sean, we’re going to go see what we can do about making that food processor something that can actually make food.

Sean: At least we don’t have to deal with Violen’s aftermath.

Metabad: That would so not rawk at all. I mean, really… ugh…

*In the local jail…*

Violen: Ooooo… I don’t feel so good guys… I feel like I’m going to hurl syrup from every part of my body…

Serges: What did we learn today Agile?

Agile: Never trust the Island Attackers to clear your name.

Serges: And…?

Agile: *sighs* Never to touch any of your inventions again.

Serges: Now come on. You need to help me bust out of here before Violen decides to hurl again.

The End

Advertisements

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: